A Mistaken....

I recently had a fallout with a friend. Here are the things that I felt:

1. I am angry;
2. I am frustrated; 
3. I am tired; 
4. I am such a loser for not being able to keep friendships;
5. I am scared that I will get in trouble with Allah for not being fair; and
6. I am lost as to what Rasulullah (peace and blessings be upon him) would do if he (pbuh) was in my position. 

 

In order that you may not be sad over matters that you fail to get, nor rejoice because of that which has been given to you. And Allah likes not prideful boasters. (al-Hadid chapter 57:22)

Oh man!! What are the chances that this fallout is about money?! So after much desperation and whining, I decided it's time to pack up those tears and complaints and say,  "Alhamdulillah hi ala bi kulli hal (all praises and thanks be to Allah in whatever circumstances)." Oh gosh at last I got it! Bahahahhaa....
I cannot control friendships, I cannot control my friend. And I am sure she can pinpoint what I am at fault with (which I am sure there are plenty). But I can be proactive by:

1. Asking for forgiveness from Allah;
2. Apologise to her for hurting her feelings; 
3. Just give her what she asks for. It's better to have less in this world than less in the Hereafter;
4. Keep on listening to Qur'an to help ease the anger that is boiling in me; and
5. Hope that God will accept my deeds. 

At the end of the day, I've learn from experience that no matter whether you are a muslim, or a non-Muslim, or a practising Muslim, or not a practising Muslim, you cannot claim God for yourself.
God is on the side of Justice, and if I am looking to get into God's good books, then be just and compassionate with people in hopes that God will take pity on my soul and forgive me for all my shortcomings.

I am far from perfect. I've had so many failed relationships with people because of my own shortcomings, so many faults that if you knew about it, you will stay far far away from me. It's amazing that God is so near to us, that He sees and knows all of our misdeeds and shortcomings, yet choose to give us a gazillion chances, again and again... God is Perfect.